Age difference

by Amanda
(Queens, NY. United States)

I'm 31 years old and my boyfriend of 3 years is 25 years old. I feel strange about this. It didn't bother for awhile, but it's passing my mind again. He says it does not bother him at all but a friend of his told me "Wow isn't he a bit to young for you?" I told my boyfriend how I felt about this and he told me not to let that comment bother me. What should I do?

Noel's response:

Your age difference is only six years, which is not a very big difference. It sounds as though you are not very sure of your own sense of yourself, so let other people's opinions bother you. I suspect this is true in other parts of your life, rather than just in the age difference between you and you boyfriend.

My suggestion is you get some counseling, or go to some personal growth workshops in order to get a greater sense of yourself as a 'solid adult', so other people's opinions don't have so much influence on you.

There is an expression in twelve-step groups that applies with you: 'what other people think of me is none of my business'.