Are these symtoms of a midlife crisis?

My husband of 17 years had a affair with a woman from work who is 10 years younger. He has left me and our children. Our divorce was final 5 months ago.. not by my choice.

This was a man who was faithful for all of these years. He blames me and says he's half the man he should be since he married me. He will not speak to me at all - not even email. He went from being the hands on dad who was there for everything and was even our son's baseball coach to only seeing them once a month, and goes a week without talking to them.

His job was very important to him and I just found out he was fireh from the job he loved and thought he was so great at, and he was escorted off the premisis.

My question is: is this typical of a man who is going through a midlife crisis? Everyone that knows him can't believe he has done this. He is living with the girl he had the affair with. She has 2 children and he thinks she is the best thing ever. Says he plans on marrying her someday.

He was very close with my family but for the last year since all of this started he will not speak to them, and he acts like me and my family do not exist. They have known him since he was 19. It's like he wants to forget we EVER happend except he can't because we have children.

Looking back there were some signs...he went through this phase where he color coordinated his clothes...he wasn't sleeping so he would scub his bathroom with a tooth brush, then he wanted to join a gym...he began drinking every night and instead of decreased sex he couldn't get enough of it from me. He is 38... can you shed some light on this for me?

Noel's reponse

It does sound as though he is in a midlife transition, which in his case may be a crisis - both for you and him. He will get through this transition, and may look back and wonder what happened, or may marry the girlfriend and go forward with his life with her.

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