Can a mid life crisis end in as short as a couple months?

by Donna
(Windsor, Ontario)

About 7 weeks ago my husband of 14 years said he didn't want to be married anymore out seemingly out of the blue. I have done research and have had many answers to many questions. However, the one I have asked you is elusive. I ask this because although we went through the ritual of the he feels old and made many changes, (some not so nice), He seems to have gotten a hold of the situation. Don't get me wrong, we still have work to do and he has said that perhaps he is in midlife crisis. His father passed last year and our oldest son moved out this year. As well; he started a new job which I have a feeling he is not happy with. There are times that he seems off still, but for the most part the changes that we have both made seem to be helping. I just get confused at times when I think that only 7 weeks have gone by and he appears to be settling in. I guess I'm afraid that he is pretending for my sake.... However, I don't want to push for anything or ask too many questions about it. So, I just want to know if it is possible to go through the crisis this quickly?

Noel's response
I have talked to other men who had a short period when they felt like what you describe your husband feeling, so it seems it is possible for the MLC to be quite short.
His Dad dying and your son moving out could well trigger some changes. He is now 'in the front row at the funeral' so to speak, and that can cause some 'life examination'.
It sounds as though you and he have decent communication skills, which is immensely helpful when going through a situation like this.

Comments for Can a mid life crisis end in as short as a couple months?

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Jan 20, 2015
Sorry to say it will come again.
by: Anonymous

Mine went through mini crisis two years in a row in march. I thought it was winter blues. Then a full year passeed he proposed after 15 years only to go through the big one again. Didn't get a job he wanted, empty nest, his mom died, poor financial winter, the perfect storm. Omg. It's hell. Be very careful it will come again. Sorry.

Aug 21, 2014
Making me cry...
by: Mikiyah

Oh sweetheart, I hug you tightly from afar!!! =D You Donna, are the rare woman who knows how to endure with grace & fierce determination.
As I read your comment & Noel's reply, I cried like a baby. With all the losses your husband & family has gone through in such a short time frame, it is very understandable that his MLC coincided with all of that, in such a short period.

You said, "I guess I'm afraid that he is pretending for my sake...." All can offer is this simple tip: to cherish every blessed moment you have together & be grateful for the memories you share. The Divine me bows to the Divine in both of you & your marriage.

.

Aug 21, 2014
Can a midlife crisis end in as short as a couple months?
by: NWF

I think he had a midlife transition rather than a midlife crisis. It never reached the crisis stage and you should be VERY THANKFUL for that.

Hugs for you and best of luck with the future.

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