He is 31, and has changed a lot in the last few months

The Question


My husband is 31, in the Navy since he was 18. We have been married for 13 years. Yes a very young marriage. He said he loved me and would love me forever.

About five months ago everything changed. His mood, behaviour, no intimacy, everything.He even questions his love for me. Could work and financial stress be the cause of all this? He blames me for all this but I refuse to believe it. Our marriage has always had open communication, love, respect etc. and now I don't even know who he is.

Please help.

Noel's response

It is possible your husband is struggling in what Daniel Levinson, who wrote "Seasons of a Man's Life" calls the 'age thirty transition'. It is also possible that work and financial stress are causing the problem.

The only suggestion I can offer is that you ask your husband to go with you to marriage counselling, and if he won't go, you go to a counsellor yourself to help deal with the emotional strain of the situation.

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