How can I help him cope with his midlife crisis?

by Evy
(Virginia)

I wanted to help him cope with his midlife crisis, but don't know how. He blames me for his unhappiness and is considering a divorce. This is not what I want because I love him and don't want our relationship to end.

Is there anything I can do or should i accept that this is something that he has to go through and let our relationship go? We have been married for 12 years and together for seventeen. He is 38 years old and I am soon to be 37; is there no turning back at this point?

Noel's response

I am not sure what to suggest. Assuming he is in a midlife transition, there is no way I know of to speed it up, so he simply has to go through it, and I doubt you can help him.

You can, however, help yourself. Start by visiting my
Depression page. There may be some helpful information for you there. Often men who are angry and irritable are actually depressed, which common with men in midlife transitions.