Husband has been gone for 10 months and is using meth
We were married 24 years and together 27 years. I kicked him out on our anniversary of 24 years, because he was starting to act strange and i could not figure out why. He is not seeing anyone else and neither am i. For the first 5 months he did not want anything to do with me and for the last 4 he has wanted sex once a week and to my surprise i keep giving in. I feel as though I am being used, but I come to find out that he is using meth quite a bit and has became an addict. I feel as though I am responsible for him still, as i loved him for so long it is so hard to turn things off. I feel as though I am enabling him to keep using drugs, by letting him come over when he wants.
It is not fair to me and I am trying hard to tell him that I don't want to see him anymore, but I feel so bad for him and I just don't understand why ? He has no one else, I am all he has to talk to and I don't want to abandon him, even though he has done it to me. Is it wrong to feel this way ? I really want to go on with my life, but I am not ready to find anyone else, but if the opportunity knocks, I am not sure that I will deny it at this point. How do i find the courage to let him go, for good? I dont want to go through this torment any longer, please help me out and give me any suggestions. I will try them all !!!!!!!
Noel's response
You need help from an organization that deals with drug addictions and spouses/families of drug addicts. Here is one: Narcanon International
If there is no drug help group near you, I recommend alanon. You can find the closest group in the yellow pages, or online.
It is important for both of you that you stop enabling him.