Is he cold or am I too sensitive?
(Amsterdam, NY 12010)
I am 43 and have been seeing a man the same age as myself for 2 1/2 years, I have been living with him now for a year. A few months after we started dating my beloved cat died. The day before he died I had called my bf while on the way home from the vet crying with the bad new of having to euthanize him. He offered no support of any kind, no emotionally or in the way of helping me to bury him. I was shocked and hurt and almost ditched him then but for some reason let it go.
A month ago my father passes away from cancer. Before he passes away my bf goes with me to spend time with dad both at his home and the last 5 days in the hospital, which in my book is how it should be. During this time I received no emotional support, no hugs, no holding, no "i love you's". I asked him several times, yet still I ask to be hugged and held and still I do but get nothing. He never was much of a physical person but I'm in pain and in need and have expressed it and he just won't give me anything. This only makes my grieving worse. I feel lonely, hurt and desperately just want to be held and loved. I only named two things for the sake of having too long question. His coldness, lack of empathy for me and for the animals I help actually scares me. He is a good man otherwise, am I right by thinking of leaving him or am I asking for too much?Noel's response
If you are looking for emotional support, he has clearly shown he is unwilling, or does not know how to give it. You will clearly not be getting it from him. So if you must have emotional support, and a physical relationship (which makes sense to me), you will need to look elsewhere.