Learning how to be an emotionally mature man at 47?

by Chris
(Northampton MA)

So here is my background. Now in my 47th year, most of my friends would consider me a kind, thoughtful, hard working white male with a great sense of humor. However I have not dated seriously or (gulp) had sex with either gender in my lifetime. I spent my 20s and 30s wrestling with a chronic headache pain and anxiety problem that kept me sidelined socially. I was able to connect with some friends, but never capable of committing to real deeper relationships. Again probably the anxiety got the best of me. After much therapy I'm now emerging as more self confident male, self assertive, and trying to see myself as more attractive as well... not easy. I'm at the standard mid life stage chronologically but inside feel more like a teenager emotionally around women and men due to my lack of experiences. This is a wonderful website: do you have any insights on how to make the rest of my journey any easier? Thank you.

Noel's response

I am not sure what to suggest. It sounds as though you feel ready for a relationship, but don't know how to go about it. You might just have to bite the bullet and ask any woman you are attracted to for a date.