midlife crisis, affair, and divorce

by Catherine
(California)

I was wondering if anyone thought my husband would return after his affair during his midlife crisis and him requesting a divorce. We have been married for 7 happy years and all of a sudden he is wondering whether he will get that new car he ever wanted? Also, a severe lack of interest in intimacy and says he is just not interested and doesn't know why. Says he feels chained to me. In my opinion, shows signs of depression for some time. Eventually, on Christmas Eve, non the less, says he wants a divorce. I ask if there is someone else and he says no he is just unhappy. He loves me, but is not in love with me.

We are in the process of the divorce and I have found out that there is another woman. He has introduced her to the children 1 1/2 months after leaving me. Guess this has been going on for sometime?

Not exactly sure what this is teaching the girls though. He refuses to be honest with his family-parents, siblings about the affair. He also will not communicate with his friends any longer. Says he will talk about anything, but this.

Will he ever regret this and return home for counseling?

Noel's response

I don't know whether he will come back. Some do, some don't.

What do you want to do with YOUR life, with or without him?