midlife crisis - I don't know who he is any more

by ann
(united kingdom)

My husband left me and my daughter four months ago and was having an affair with a 28 year old collegue,in the space of twelve weeks he left us moved in with her and got her pregnant she now doesnt want him and they have split up but instead of taking time to sort himself out he is now seeing his ex girlfriend who he was engaged to 22 years ago hes sayxs its not a relationship its just someone to talk to and have a drink with the other woman is going to have the baby but hes told hr he wants nothing to do with it and the woman hes seeing now hes not being honest with we have been married for 14 years and together for 21 years I dont know whpo hes become in the last year I dont recognise him anymore why he keeps putting me and my daughter through this I dont know,do you think hes in a midlife crisis hes just such a different person in his attitude is he clutching at straws with this woman he used to see I just dont know what to say to him anymore I am so hurt and humiliated and so is my daughter any advise would be good?


Noel's response

It sounds as though he has dug himself into quite a hole.

I suggest you protect yourself financially - see a lawyer to make sure he can not run up debts you will be responsible for, and make sure your name is on your major assets (house, car, savings etc.) so he cannot sell them.

Then move on with your life as best you can. He will emerge from this mess he is making, but it could be a while.

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