midlife crisis?

My husband and I have been together for 14 years. He is 44 years old. We have had a great life and marriage together until the past year and a half.


Our problems started when he and one of both our friends which is a woman started txt.

At first it was ok, then it became more often til they txt all day long.

I ended up moving out of the house several times in the past year and a half. He swears nothing happened between them (she is also married) all they do is talk.

He has lied about talking to her several different times to me. Time and time again through this he swears he loves me and wants our marriage to work and I keep giving him chances coz I do love him.

He has been very distant and seems very cold through this. He seems to be a different person with me and his whole family.

He is a hard person to talk to and even harder for him to talk about his feelings.

I'm not sure what he is going through. I am trying to understand but is hard. He somtimes is so distant and mean for no reason.

I do know he is not talking to this woman any longer.

He is not happy with himself lately with weight his gray hair and even his work.

In your opinion is this a mid life crisis or maybe its more?

NOEL'S ANSWER:
It does sound as though he is having a midlife crisis. For your protection, I recommend you read my "For Women" page, and perhaps get Jed Diamon's "Irritable Male Syndrome" book, for which there is a link on that page. Your husband might find it useful reading as well.

You might also suggest that your husband visit this website.

Noel

Comments for midlife crisis?

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Jul 14, 2010
Same Boat
by: TM

I know exactly how you are feeling.

My husband has been doing the same thing to me for almost 2 years now. Talking to another woman, he swears there is nothing going on, but he went behind my back and got a prepaid cell phone and was talking to her 10-15 times a day. She is married also.

This is definitely not the man that I once knew, I don't know who he is anymore.

He says he loves me, wants us to work. I feel as if he wants his cake and wants to eat it too.

I am lost and hurt, wondering all the time when the next ball will drop.

Wish I could help you or give you words of wisdom, but since I can't I hope just knowing there is someone else going through exactly what you are will be here to listen will help!!

Best of luck!

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