My husband moved in with a former cocaine addict who is now on anti depressants

by Babs
(Canada)

The Question


My 59 year old husband of 38 years set me up so that all our debts were consolidated into our mortgage and then left me 4 days later - saying he wanted to live a different lifestyle. He never said a word about being unhappy and in fact appeared to be very happy.

He totally blindsided me and our family. He has a girlfriend who is 7 years younger than me but looks at least a couple of years older. She used to use cocaine quite heavily up until 5 years ago. Currently, she is on 2 different types of valium, an antidepressant, has depression issues and they both get drunk together nearly every night.

My husband used to be a successful businessman and was looked up to and respected in our community. Now, he hardly ever works. He has not spoken to me since he left 7 months ago and cannot seem to face me. He is now stressed and depressed over money issues. This woman is also very controlling and wants him to get rid of everything from his past, including mementos of trips he and his buddies used to take each year. He is pushing his 2 children and our grandson out of his life and does not talk to his family and most of his old friends. Why would a man do this to himself, his wife and his family.

Noel's response

My guess is that he has an alcohol problem, and hooked up with another addict thinking it would be 'freer and more fun'. Obviously it hasn't turned out that way. I suspect he may have to 'hit bottom' before he wakes up to the fact he has a drinking problem and needs to get help.

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