needing a younger woman

by Mary
(Surrey)

My husband is 48yrs old, for the past 18 months he has been trying to befriend women a lot younger than himself. He has now left me because he says he doesn't know what he wants, we have been married 27yrs, but he is 21yrs younger than me. He tried to have a relationship with a very young 24yr old, but it didn't work, he has always suffered with depression since his teens and didn't have a very good childhood. On top of all this, unfortunatly he has never been successfull in any business he has tried. He is on medication for depression, but it doesn't seem to help. Could all of this be a midlife crisis or do you think there is something else, everyone is missing. Another thing i think i should mention is, he doesn't have any children of his own, but has always said he doesn't want any. He gets on really well with all my children and loves all the grandchildren.

Noel's response

His actions do suggest a midlife transition. It sounds as though there are several areas of his life that are not working out the way he hoped, and is looking outside himself (i.e. trying to be attractive to younger women) for what he can only find inside.

I don't know what to suggest to you. His transition will end in time. whether he comes back to you (if you still want him to) is unknowable.

Comments for
needing a younger woman

Click here to add your own comments

Mar 27, 2012
Wow sounds like my life...
by: Anonymous

My boyfriend/fiance of 12yrs, is trying to start relationship with a 24 yr old. He is 33. I am 42. I have 3 children. Him none. He hasn't been happy for awhile and he feels like he was meant to do more with his life, he feels like he is stuck and is depressed. I have been so understanding with all of this. I just want him to be happy whether its with me or not. He deserves that. Recently, this 24 yr old stood him up for a dinner date. he says he is no longer interested and now he thinks that we can go back to where we were before, but I don't know if I can or want to. And how do I know he really is coming back for me or just because the other didn't pan out for him?

Mar 26, 2012
Re: Needing a younger woman
by: Anonymous

Sounds like he has a lot to work on at the emotional and spiritual level. I wonder if you have been seeing a therapist for yourself or do some soul searching on your own because it must be hard to live with someone who is always depressed. Take care.

Click here to add your own comments

Join in and write your own page! It's easy to do. How?
Simply click here to return to Ask Noel