the other woman

The Question

My 60 year old husband has been having an emotional involvement with a woman 25 years my junior. I accidentally discovered that they had been communicating for months via cell phone, text etc.

Both claim they are just friends, but this was all done secretly.

This woman is married and as far as i know, intends to remain so. I love my husband and understand that he is going through a mid life crisis (text book case).

My question is - would it be wrong of me to ask her to stop this relationship with my husband? I have asked him and he claims it is harmless and should not upset me. I feel threatened and he has recently lied to me about their ongoing contact.

Noel's response

I don't think asking her to stop the relationship would solve your problem. If you did, either they would stop, and he would start an emotional relationship with someone else, or they would not stop, and simply become more secretive.

My only suggestion is that you ask your husband to go to marriage counseling with him, and if he will not go, see a psychotherapist on your own, to help you know what to do.

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