Together for 10 years and just been dumped

by amanda
(france)

Bit complicated but I guess everyones stories are. We have been together for 10 years, we have split before when he felt he didn't want to be with me. He is French, I am Scottish, we lived in Scotland. Last year I asked him did he want to move back to France with me. Start new jobs etc.. We sold the house and came here. On Saturday morning we were looking at flats to rent in the city had gotten a job in. He went out to visit his mum in hospital and two hours later came back and said we were finished. I hardly speak the language and took a train the same day and came to my sister's flat. We have talked every day or texted- he says he needs to sort his head out and stuff like that. I just can't get over the shock of someone I thought I knew so well could do that to me.

Is he having a breakdown or am I just being delusional and in denial?
thanks for reading

Noel's response

It is possible his mum being in the hospital has something to do with it. You don't say why she is there, but it may be facing him with his own mortality, and assuming he is middle aged (somewhere between 35 and 60), he might truly be sorting things out. I know it is a shock, but it may not have much to do with you, so try not to take it too personally.

There is no way to know whether you are truly finished, but I recommend you figure out where you want to go with your life, whether it is with him or not.

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