what do i do

by illeana
(australia)

my husband left after 30 yrs together. I didn't see it coming. we hardly ever argued thought we had a good marriage but been together since teenagers. we are still having sex feel its my only way of holding on to him.

we own property but i had to move out of the area because he took up with a girl in the town who had been trying to break us up for ages.

sure its a midlife crisis. i am now standing in centrelink lines and renting after 7 months of counselling and hospital. i am devastated because i love him very much.

yes he is sleeping with her and me. how long will this last. he seems to be doing it harder than me mentally. do they ever get through it and come back. advice pls on how i should act around him.

Noel's response

By continuing to have sex with him, the chances are you are not really hanging on to him, but rather just giving him another sex partner.

Does the girlfriend know you are still having sex with him? If she doesn't, I would tell her, so she doesn't think she has him all to herself.

I have known couples who have separated, and one or the other had an affair, and then they got back together. I have also know couples who have separated and not got back together.

My best advice is for you to figure out what you want, and what you will and will not put up with. Look after yourself. If he sees you are no longer a pushover, it may make him think. And at lease you will be true to yourself.