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Will he come crashing down

My husband is 45 and I am 40. two years ago he lost his mum to cancer and has never got over it. He works very long hours in our business and started pushing his family away. Then 6 months before we separated he stopped the sex said he didn't think about it anymore he just seemed to throw himself into his work and would do things for his staff instead of his family. I asked him if he had feelings for one of his staff but he said no and is still saying no because he doesn't want a relationship because he can't handle what comes with a relationship. He goes out drinking with his 21 year old staff and when I saw him yesterday he looked like death he was so grey in colour will he eventually just fall in a heap because I know he won't handle the business and out partying. He doesn't think there is anything wrong with him so if he doesn't get help will his world come crashing down.

Noel's response

He does sound very stressed, so chances are he will have some kind of breakdown - heart attack, psychological breakdown, bankruptcy - if he doesn't get his life back in order. His mum dying sounds as though it was a trigger, which might be exacerbated by him being in his forties, which is often a time of major transition, and the realization that one is 'not immortal'.

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