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falling in love with my boss

by tootsie
(ferdinand indiana )

what should i do i do not love my husband but care about him not wanting to hurt him. I am falling in love with my boss, but he won't tell me how he feels because he knows i am married. I know he has feelings for me by the way he acts around me and looks at me. Help i can't quit my job because of financial reasons and my family would not approve. I am tired of being unhappy.

Noel's response

Love builds over time. 'Falling in love' is really an act of projecting your inner 'perfect mate' onto another person. True love is a verb - and is characterized by kindness and compassion. If you truly do not love your husband, perhaps marriage counseling can help restore the love you once felt for him.

If you don't see any possibility of saving your marriage and getting back the love between you, you should perhaps consider separation. But regarding your boss, I would recommend you not get involved with him until you have 'cleaned up the home front'.

Regarding your feeling tired of being unhappy, I hope you realize that happiness is an 'inside job', and no matter what man you are with, admittedly some may be more compatible than others, he cannot 'make you happy', as that is up to you.

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