Husband had an enalarged prostrate and went off the rails
My husband got to fifty and believed going to die at 60 as parents did . He had to suffer two deaths one was his sister where he had to turn off the respirator and my father where we watched him die in the hospital. he had a lot of stress at work and the he found out he had enlarged prostrate and coeliac in the space of 3 years. He went off the rails and had being going to strip clubs taking customers on work trips . he then with everything started going on his own and watching porn and dating sites I don't know whether he had any affairs but he had a text once from a girl which he dismissed and no longer stays over in London but comes back same day I believe he did she was Romanian and she would be in early twenties. He had another condition erectile dysfunction too and we ended up having to re mortgage because he ran up so many debts. We had many rows and I told him he could leave on numerous occasions but he said where could he go and has never left. He is now trying to rebuild the relationship but will not go to a counselor. He did say the other week that he had to go away and he took my hands in his and faced me and said I was not to worry as he wanted our home and me. I found out he had
been to a strip club again and he promised he wouldn't with work colleagues. He has been very loving and kind and cuddles up on a night on the sofa with me and he spends all his time with me.
Can I trust him again .
There is so much more to this but it is difficult to write down.
Thank you for the opportunity to ask a questionNoel's response
I think you can answer your question better than I can. It is possible your husband has come to terms with his fears, and is through what sounds like a crisis.
Having the deaths you mentioned, along with his fear of dying in the next ten years is quite a load for a person, but eventually he may have accepted the situation and moved on.
An enlarged prostate is not necessarily anything to worry about. It is almost universal in men over fifty in the western world. If he is truly worried he should see his doctor and if necessary get a biopsy to see whether it is cancer. Otherwise it is most likely 'Benign Prostatic Hyperplaisia' (BPH for short), and although inconvenient, not dangerous.
There are both pharmaceuticals and natural supplements that can help deal with the symptoms.
When trust is broken it can take a long time to build it again, but my suggestion is you take it one day at a time and give him the benefit of the doubt as much as you feel able to.