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Is he having a midlife crisis

by Joanne

I've been with my husband for 25 years. We have a 20 year old daughter and until 3 years ago everything seemed good. He was offered the opportunity of a promotion and asked us what we thought as it would impact on our family life of course we told him to go for it and he did.

Within a short time his personality seemed to change. He talked really badly about people 'beneath' him then started on me. I am a illiterate grunt fat old you name it anything negative he stopped caring about our daughter who he had been amazing with before.

My daughter and I got very close during this time and were ready to leave. He did at this point say he would change that our family was important. It didn't last long he was offered another promotion this time he told us that he was taking the job as he'd put his life on hold for us for too long.

He is distant self-centred selfish and now spends time away at work. he will stay in hotels to celebrate the opening of an envelope when he's away he has no contact with us whatsoever.

But he will sit and text and email all night and not tell us who he's talking to. It's become unbearable. He hasn't said he doesn't love me but that's really because he doesn't talk. I suspect that he is having a affair maybe just emotional but every time I talk about it I'm a psycho bitch and I'm do awful for not trusting him.

Noel's response

It sounds as though his ego has kicked into high gear, and has the 'the working class can kiss my ass, I've got the foreman's job at last' syndrome.

My only suggestion is that you let him know how his behaviour is affecting you, and that you are not willing to put up with it. If he is not willing to change, you have to decide whether you want to stay in the marriage.

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