My husband says he thinks he loves me, but doesn't know. His affair started a couple of years ago.
He has met someone online from the US, we live in Canada. They have never met physically. He has a record and cannot get a passport, (he has assault chargers from his younger years, including hitting me.) she is 19 and plans to be in school for another 7 years in the US. He is 50. He started all this when I moved his dying mother into our home and I gave her 24 hour care with no help from him or other family members, while I worked. I sat with her during the nights holding her hand and slept in a chair, while he was in the garage having on line sex with her. The other Girl, (I think she is still a child) has money coming to her from her mothers death, but this could take years, and says she will give him half of what we owe to leave me. I will not give up my house, I have worked so hard to fix it up, I have 5 children that I have raised in this house, the youngest is 19 and is our child together. I have always put every cent I have made into this house, he spends his money on himself, and he has never lifted a finger to help even with his own daughter. He cannot afford to move out and I cannot afford to pay the mortgage on my own either, but it is killing me to be living with him, sometimes I think I am suicidal. It will cost me just as much to live somewhere else as it does in my own home, and yet I couldn't afford it either way. He tells me all the time that he thinks he might be doing the wrong thing, and that he doesn't know what to do anymore. I don't want him, he acts like we are still in love, touching and kissing me, I don't respond, and I refuse to have sex with him, but I can't get on with my life either. I don't know very many people and only have a 2 friends. My life was my family and now everyone has there own life. I'm painfully shy, I have a very kind soul, I do tell the truth but I am never unkind to anyone, and at 55 years old I'm still beautiful. I am not full of myself I'm just trying to give you an idea of me. My husband still tells me I'm the kindest person he has ever met. I have seen a councilor but it didn't help. This is beyond anything I can take. His behavior is not normal, or is it for a man going through mid-life crisis. Your advise is really needed.