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To the other woman out there whose life is only beginning after male mid life crisis

by shirley

I also have sent a message to Noel and would like to send a message to all us women who are in the same situation with their partners in midlife crisis.

Have you read the book Men are from Mars and Women from Venus? That gives you the insight of a male who came from another planet that shows no feelings to mankind, as the woman came from Venus with all the nurturing a woman can give. It is hard for a woman, as we feel every emotional need to survive, and we are surviving.

My children and I were torn apart by what he put us through and I still get upset when I think of all the good times we had and memories. But i have soldiered on no matter how much I still love him, we were married for 32 years, and he left with only the clothes he had on his back.

I have won my home and the car and the respect of my children also the memories from when we were 17 and he 19.

Don't worry the other woman will never achieve what we have achieved with them, don't ever forget they are the second best to us, we were the first. we are on the mother ship now and they are stuck with the alien. Good luck best wishes.

Comments for To the other woman out there whose life is only beginning after male mid life crisis

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Dec 09, 2015
Are they happy with the OW at all?
by: Anonymous

Reading blogs and books about Men Midlife crisis helped me understand STBXH behavior for past 7yrs, all the symptoms are there.. started gradually, complaining about my physical, calling names, everything I say bothered him, the diets, selfies, constantly on phone texting, lack of interest around the house... anti name it... wasnt until this past June that I caught him with her but by then she claimed to be in relationship about a yr..she wrote it on court papers!!! This man has done and said the most bizarre lies.. behavior its off the chart... Its like he hates me soo bad.. during those yrs before june, he will do his stuff but then when arguing will apologize and tried to be good for short time... then back to funk but worst. Well its been 5 mths and the worst yet.. I have grown tremendously, stronger, choose NC. Filed for D and final court day 01/21/2016 even at court he lied about finances and properties so I hired attorney...He thinks Im settling for chump change and leaving and fancy cars to him and OW.. so he claim no need for attorney.. will see!!! He finally stop calling me or questions are:
*Why they are so secretly about their life or where they live.
*Why denies OW til this very moment, although seen driving around with her..He hide her from everyone!!!
*Are they happy?
*One minute calls to check on me..then sudden he is the Monster again... Why?? if I dont bother him.
*Wont take kids to his place.. told them they will never step there..
*Will they snap of this ever? Any guilt ever?
*Constantly blaming me for destroying marriage.. you this you that..With evil look!!
*Shows to church suddenly, fellowships like nothing but minute the brothers start telling him how missed he jets out door..
*Until this day no even $3.00 for milk!!!


Apr 15, 2015
Here we go
by: Abraham A. Barnes

This is such a great resource that you are providing and you give it away for free :-).

Jul 12, 2012
OW Just Doesn't Get It and NEVER will
by: Anonymous

Yes, we deserve the car, house and respect. The wife who wakes up one day to find herself living with a monster, who shreds her heart and soul, and her children's hearts and souls. She at least deserves the material things that she has worked for. It is at least some comfort not to have your children ripped from their home.
Besides, he's young, (or so he believes), and so is the OW, they have plenty of time to rebuild! After all, the OW wouldn't be in it for the material, now would she? Of course not, she is the only one who truly loves and understands him. So have him, he is a nightmare from hell now, Enjoy it, just be sure to get the alimony and child support in the bank on time. I am better than her and can do better than him. 2 years out and the woman who initially cried for 4 months straight, is now fine, confident and re-building her life. He is as big of a monster as ever, difference is, now it doesn't rule my life.

Dec 12, 2011
child of dad in crisis
by: Anonymous

I'm 32 yrs. old and can't believe what my dad did and continues to do. My parents were married for 35 yrs and now its over. My dad has a 39 yr old girlfriend whom he met at work. He is 56. I also have a sister who is 35. He used up be there for us and a true family man. My sister has 3 children who he devoted his free time to be with them and now there's hardly an effort. The OW knew my parents were married and she was also married and has kids my nephews age (yuck)!!!!) He also bought a new ( big for him) bright red truck. I also had a child in the middle of the mess and he's never around to get to know him. It's like a light switch went off and my dad as I knew him was gone. Is there really such thing as a midlife crisis or is this the guy he really is???

Nov 10, 2011
moving on
by: mothership

To the last comment. obviously you have not moved on or your the OW. Otherwise you would not be reading the comments

Nov 10, 2011
already shining
by: mothership

the last comment move on, sorry you haven't otherwise you would not be reading the comments.

Nov 07, 2011
Get a life ladies! Move on!
by: Flor

Get a life ladies & get a job!

Oct 11, 2011
by: Anonymous

this is to the last comment.

Sorry to hear about you and your husband. Please read the poem i did. I know exactly how you feel, be strong, this is your turn to shine now and what you want, to make you better. It will take time, but time is a healer. Make the life better for you and your children now as i have had to through the hurt and turmoil he caused to me and my children.It is our life now that is most important and what you will achieve and you will. Hang in there, be strong. Best wishes.

Oct 08, 2011
beginning of an end
by: Anonymous

My husband left 2 days ago. We had a wonderful life together with our 4 children. His mother died you see, jobs were hard to find, he was let down by a job offer, then found a good job that put a lot on him. He would come home and ignore the children, just fall asleep. I had tried to get him to see the doctor I knew he was depressed. He withdrew himself from people, I could see he was making an effort to be himself. He stopped noticing the children and then me, I remember that day end of July 11. He said he was leaving and blamed me. I have faults but his reasons were silly. He went from a kind loving cuddly man to a stranger, it feels like he has died. I have not contacted him and will not, but have been reading comments from other Midlife widows. I am getting on with life with our children one day at a time. Its all I can do. We had great memories, I offered my hand he didn't take it. Everything he held most dearly in his life he has left and there is nothing I can do about it. I am accepting it, but with great sadness. My husband would have not liked this person, my husband is gone.

Aug 08, 2011
got everthing
by: Anonymous

When comments say get a life. Then i am sorry to say we had a life and a good one till the ex husband took that away, for his own selfish reason.

Did you not know these husbands who seek the OW wear the heart in there pants and not in the place it should be? Sorry to say don't look for the heart because you will never find it. That went with the memories of his first wife.

Aug 08, 2011
got everthing
by: Anonymous

Sorry that the comments received sounds as if you are the OW of others good fortune.

Yes it is true that we were their first life and the second life is because we did not want it. what life have you got the second or the first. Also this paragraph is for the women or ex wives not the OW. I hope you move on as i have. Be happy.

Aug 08, 2011
got everything
by: Anonymous

Sorry that you think i will dwell on what my ex husband did to me and the kids, we do not want to be reminded of the hurt he caused, so yes i have moved on.

and as for the respect of my children, that comment was to say he has not got that anymore.
You cannot comment on my life, and i don't take any blame, when your husband has been brainwashed into a very callous man from the OW, she can have him.
Yes i have always worked and got a lovely home and family. I have never taken anything from the state as i am a nurse of 38 years. I am sorry that you are still bitter within and feel that you have not moved on. Does this answer your question. Hope so.

Jun 20, 2011
Bitter ex wife indeed
by: Anonymous

Can't believe you think you've won the respect of your children. Did you not have it already?
So you got the car and the house- how sad that you think everything is yours.

Jun 20, 2011
Sad First lives
by: Anonymous

You won your house and lives. What you mean is you take no responsibility for the breakdown of your marriage and you make damn sure he got nothing from it just cause he fell in love again.

You probably will dwell on it for the rest of your life and play the victim forever.
I wonder if you ever worked or are you going to sponge on Spousal maintenance for the rest of your years?
Move on, get a life, he has.

May 04, 2011
to go girl
by: mothership

glad you read my comments and the poem i wrote to help the other wives, we are the ones that are left with the grief and why should we? we can and have got through this, with the strength and sanity to hold it all together.

we will find the love and the happiness and no woman needs the man to do this, we are determined to show that we are the ones that survive no matter what, the other woman is the one that cannot deal with her emotions so they have to take other wives good fortune. we will always keep our memories of the good times, that is one thing they will never be able to steal the rest they can have with pleasure.

Good luck to the wives and be strong to show we can survive and be happy again.It has been five years now since my ex husband on a MLC and were married of 32 years and met when i was 17 and he 19 if i can do it so can you. Best wishes.

Apr 19, 2011
by: Anonymous

You go girl, we are the first in his life and the other woman is on another ship with the alien.

Feb 08, 2011
poem to the wifes and husbands that left on mlc for the other woman.
by: Anonymous

I wrote this poem to help the wives whos husband on midlife crisis go with another woman. remember mothership.

To the ow there is a saying

the ow is there to take someones life, the wife is there for the rest of his life, the kids are there to ease the pain, when someone else thinks its there gain.

the ow will take whatever they can, when the husband jumps into the fan. They will only desire their sexual need, when they think the woman have controlled their feed. It is only time when there habit will stray, when they have had enough of the fools at prey. Always remember the ow is short stay, only when they cannot control play.
They take what is there, no matter their habit and think their life is one big faggett

They will say they love to get what they want, to try and get a life that nobody else wants. They will feed their habit to there desire, when the other man tries to put out the fire. When all they want for their fantasy to succeed, when all they want for it to expire. So when they cannot control their need, the love and good fortune they cannot steal. They throw away till the next one comes, o what a pity there life was not there, but what ow is fare. The husband can eventually see the wife was better and the ow was not for me.

If they try to take to become the 2nd or 3rd wife, its only because they never had a life. So when they say i love you for ever, that is the coward of the 3 white feather. The woman can lie until her habit is free, thats when she takes the next husbands fee. So dont deluse the other womans life, to take away the other mans life. The day will come, when the other woman falls. To rise again with another husbands goal. The other woman never had a life of there own, it is made up of other lives souls. One day the other woman will retire, but that depends on the husbands fire. The ow have no heart and soul, that is deepdown within the hole, so dont go within the hole, you only get the aliens role. To be mislead of the other womans intent. Keep well away of the ow desire as you will be the next to retire.

When the other man comes along with glee and hope,he will also seed the slope. The ow is not there to stay, they take there money and run way. So when their time is upto go, husbands please dont look back you will no.

Jan 26, 2011
to wifes who husband on midlife crisis
by: mother ship.

I know you feel that your life has ended. NO it has not, it is just the beginning of how you make it for yourself.

At first it is not real of what has happened to you or your family. I know you will get through it as I have. I am still hurting in my own way but my life and my children have got through the hard time now, and I am at the stage of contentment and feel good that I have turned my life around to make me happy again. I hope that you can as well in time.

Life is more precious with your family and friends than the fantasy they live in. My ex husband has just started to communicate to me, so I feel he has now wakened up from his coma of the fantasy, but as I said, it is your turn to shine and you will be happy, hang in there, best wishes.

Jan 26, 2011
wife who affected by husband midlife crisis
by: mother ship

I hope my comments help to the other wives out there that are suffering emotional pain, that the male midlife crisis put us in. A life that we do not understand their behaviour, by the husband thinking they have the right to punish another person who they once loved and their children and leaving there wife and family for the other woman.

They think it is a better life, but to destroy the people that they once loved, its a cop out to the mans ego trip and the other woman is never going to make them happy as the husband will never forget the memories and the GUILT. The male midlife crisis comes to an end, then they wake up from their coma of fantasy, so what a waste of a life with the stranger other woman.

Jan 18, 2011
Thank you
by: Anonymous

My husband of 20 years has just announced he no longer loves me and hasn't for a long time! News to me and the children. We are all devastated.

But your post put a smile back on my face - the other woman is most definitely welcome to the alien that seems to have taken over my husbands body!!!

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