WHEN WILL IT END?
(LEXINGTON, KY USA)
STARTED IN 2004 WHEN I WAS 53...LOST INTEREST IN WORK...STURGGLED EVER SINCE...THIS IS SAME AGE MY FATHER AND HIS FATHER STARTED DRINKING...I DONT DRINK...CLINICALLY DEPRESSED, SUICIDAL, FEELINGS OF GUILT AND WORTHLESSNESS....WHEN WILL IT END...FAMILY VERY SUPPORTIVE...WHEN WILL IT END?Noel's Answer
I cannot tell you when it will end, but I recall having the same thoughts when I was going through it. It took me about five years. I see you have been struggling for five years as well.
I can tell you it WILL end, and I suspect a few years after that you will be able to look back and have a better grasp of what it was all about.
I am in my sixties now, and enjoying my life more than ever.
My only suggestions are to pay attention to your spiritual life, treat your family with love and care, even when you don't feel like it, and know that you are not alone. I assume you are getting medical and/or psychological help with your depression. I had five years of mild depression, where it felt as though there was a grey blanket over my life.
You might also take the New Warrior Training Adventure (www.mkp.org) which most men find useful in getting a sense of mission/purpose in their lives. I took this training when I was just starting into my midlife transition, and although it did not shorten the transition, it was useful in getting through it.